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Rising Emotions – Part 1(new series)

Disclaimer : This story is work of fiction.Any resemblence with any living person in India or Abroad is purely coincidential.Author holds no responsibility for the same and no lawsuits will be entertained 🙂

Sometimes.. life leaves you at such a point.. from where all things seem too far… a lot distant… you can’t go back.. you can’t go forward… it seems you are controlled all the time.. & you are on a pause mode..d problem is there is no backward mode..
You need to think abt a lot of things before you take a stand.. but what when you have just reached a limit… a limit wherein you can’t take things anymore, what should one do.. still stay quiet..just because lot of things rely on that decision or for once think abt yourself!!!!!
Priya was still thinking…At one time she & Ashish had been so happy together..but now.. she felt this relationship
had no meaning…no respect nothing…Ashish very soon had started ignoring her.. ignoring everything.. even their relationship..
In the initial days, he was just not ready as any other guy & didn’t want to commit. He still wanted to live a life, he
lived always,, he didnt want to adjust.. he didnt want to share his time..he was only thinking abt himself..
Priya knew that Ashish was just not ready and one day he will understand his responsibilities towards her.
Initially Ashish never ignored her on purpose, & Priya did understand this. She tried to adjust her life style
so that Ashish does not have to adjust anything..
Before meeting Priya, Ashish’s weekday’s started with work .. ended with work.. On Friday evenings he played bridge with his friends till it was morning.Weekend’s he used to play whole day with his friends. After meeting Priya he used to spare or squeeze half an hour from his weekend schedule for her.. & now, he just didn’t want to share any of his time with her.Initially Priya tried to convince him, but Ashish just didnt want to understand.
Ashish was a nice guy, loved by all his friends, who never took anything seriously, a more carefree guy. Priya loved him.. but she was sick of his habits..he didnt seem to think about them.. everything seemed to be a joke for him.. Before meeting him, Priya was such a lively chirpy talkative girl, full of enthu.. but now she was tired.. she was tired of this relationship.. she was tired of compromising all the time, she was tired of Ashish’s ignorance.she had lost her life to be with Ashish.. but Ashish never seemed to notice anything. Priya was tired of him now…She didn’t have Ashish to talk to.. She didn’t have anyone to talk about this for that matter..
Mere love can’t bind a relation.. commitment is also important…Priya had told Ashish the last day.. he seemed to ignore it as always.. asking her if she saw the IPL…She didn’t know, what was going on in her life… what will happen.. she was totally shattered..she felt she was tied up.. she couldn’t express her feelings openly anymore….she didn’t know how to make Ashish understand.. but she knew one thing.. this relation was going totally out of control and Ashish was taking her for granted totally.
Ashish knew that, even if Priya was upset, she would come back to him. He knew she loved her so much that, she just can’t be upset all the time with him.. He had even stopped making up for his mistakes..He knew Priya will understand. But he didn’t know.. this slowly was making them apart. Priya had started to feel this relation as the biggest mistake in her life.. their relation was getting sour..with every passing day…
Priya was still on two minds.. She still loved Ashish and she knew he too did love her.. But, there were many more things which needed attention.. She didn’t know what to do.. She tried to explain her condition to Ashish.. She tried explaining Ashish,that he needs to give some time for them as well..Ashish seemed to nod from his laptop,,
Was he even listening..??? She knew it was high time.. she can’t live like this anymore…
hmmmmmm….It was time for Priya to leave office.. Today she thought she will convince Ashish… yes she can convince him.. Her car had broken down, so Ashish had promised he will pick her up by 6. She will talk him over a coffee…at starbuck’s…she knew.. they just needed some time together..some time only for themselves.. yes she knew everything would be fine again…
It was already 7, Ashish was still not there.. This was not new,,,, Ashish always seemed to forget things.. Priya had started to live with it.
She called him.. no response… she called him again.. no response.. She thought he would be in a meeting and thought of waiting. It was around 8.45 now.. She tried calling him again and again…now she started panicking.. if everything was fine with Ashish…she couldn’t lose him for sure…she was new to this place.. so she didn’t know any of his friends numbers.. She tried his office no.. but it was busy….& then it was ringing & ringing… no response again……  she thought of heading back home..she finally got a taxi at around 9:40. The place seemed almost dark with noone around…. she was worried.. really worried… what would have happened…
She didn’t know what to do,she didn’t know whom to contact now. She didn’t know, if she should have waited at her office or she should head to Ashish’s office..But she didn’t know his office address..she finally thought … its better she reach home & check there…. She reached home by 10:15.. She just ran in to knock..
She kept knocking the door…. no response… she didn’t know what to do.. she was very worried for Ashish..what might have happened to him.. she started opening the door with the keys..but the door seemed 2 not budge…she told to herself.. stop panicking.. everything would be fine… ALL IZZ WELL>..ALL IZZ WELL
Finally she opened the door to find herself in a dark room…She directly headed into all the rooms to search for Ashish.. there was no trace of him… She didn’t know what to do..
She again tried calling him… but he was not picking…she was all in tears now… what to do… in a new place… where she didn’t know anything ..where will she find him… where.. she wrote a note for Ashish saying if he is back… call her.. she headed out of the apartment.. to search for Ashish… what could have happened to him..
It was almost 11:50 now.. Priya somehow found her way back to the apartment.. it was too cold out.. She thought she might find Ashish home..but she found herself alone at the apartment…
She was all in tears… noone to contact….she waited next to the window..looking out to find a trace of Ashish…but she couldnt see anyone….she didn’t know when she slept by the window…
She got up with the sound of a light hummming from the kitchen… she looked up.. it was almost 3.00 in the morning.
She went slowly to find Ashish drinking water.. She looked up at him, he was fine… Ashish suddenly looked up and smiled at her.. “hmm did I wake u up.. I thought I was not loud… “
Priya couldn’t believe him.. he came back at 3.00 in the night and owed him an explanation… and on the other hand, he acted as if everything was normal…
“Where had you been all the time…..do you see d time…can u explain..” Priya couldn’t control herself.. she was full of mix emotions.. she was happy to see him safe & sound… angry to see his attitude & hurt & felt like crying… Ashish took it too casually …& said…”aahhh one of my friends.. asked me to join them for dinner… & then we played… I just forgot to inform you.. & then it was too late, so I thought u would be asleep by then”
Priya just couldn’t believe what she heard… she didn’t understand… “How can she ever love a person who was standing in front of him…she didn’t know if he was the same Ashish…..she didn’t know what to say to Ashish..who seemed so normal..as if everything was normal
Priya was about to ask something… when Ashish headed to his bed.. saying he was feeling sleepy…
Now, she knew what to do.. Yes enough is enough… There had to be a limit to everything ..she really was not ready to take that attitude…She had forgiven Ashish on mostly all such instances, but now he had reached tooo far…she couldn’t handle this relationship anymore… She needed time to think about them… Yes she did need time…It was 5.00 in the morning.. she was ready… she got up… wrote a letter for Ashish…& kept it on the breakfast table for him to read.

She took her handbag, she left the keys behind.. she slowly closed the door behind her….
 
36 Comments

Posted by on April 16, 2010 in Kya yahi pyaar hai

 

26/11.. & an year after that!!!!

Hi,

Hope you all are doing good!!!!

It’s been a long time .. I was here… and I had been planning to bounce back with something.

Today being the 1st anniversary of the 26/11 Mumbai terror attacks, I thought of writing something to give a tribute to all the martyr’s who fought, who helped/saved other’s or say our life.

A Big thanks to all these wonderful people.

Last year, I was not as usual.. so came home early and at night … as I was not sleepy.. was going through all channels… when they showed some news about a gang war between two groups in the Leopold Café. I got hooked up to the news and the news took a big U turn…from Gang war it changed to terrorist attack and soon… from Cama..Taj..trident …Nariman House..CST…how ATS chief Mr. Hemant KarKare ..was getting ready in front of my eyes… to face the challenge… then I heard after around 15-20 mins was all three Heroes Mr. KArkare..Kamte and Salaskar.. trio death…..all shocking news all together….

The whole operation went for more than 3 days… In front of my eyes… I saw the mighty Taj burning… something all mumbaities always look upto….the rescue operation in Nariman house being the toughest of all… 10 terrorists who brought on such a damage to the country in all ways… more than 165 innocent people lost their lives…

1 terrorist Ajmal Kasab was caught alive…..

This Year: Still trial going on for Ajmal Kasab.. Don’t know.. how many more years it’s going to continue… People who lost their loved ones.. still grieve for their loses…

And Has our Government learnt any lesson from it….. can we be sure that .. 26/11 won’t repeat again…It’s true that everyone fought with all their efforts to save people and property last year…but this situation could have been averted.. had they seen it coming….

Are we safe now…??

A news paper reported “The attacks, thought to have been well-planned in Pakistan, meant suspension of peace talks that were on between India and Pakistan. Since then there has just been accusations and counter claims by both countries regarding the attacks, and Pakistan’s commitment in curbing terrorism that is nurtured on its soil. The Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh has said that talks between the two neighbors will not restart until the Mumbai attack suspects were brought to justice.”

Is this all what you get … is this an assurance… what do you mean by… attacks….thought..to be planned…??

Suspension of peace talks……we don’t want any peace talks… with such a country…

1 year and nothing has changed much… when will we Learn a Lesson… when….how many more such attacks would we see…. It’s true … Mumbai always bounces back… but what about all those innocent people…

Why are we still insecure?

However… in true sense… I(all Indians) would like to give my(our)  tribute to all the martyrs who laid down their lives.. and would like to pay homage to all the people.. who lost their loved ones..

Let’s pray that…we don’t get to see anything like this …again…

 
10 Comments

Posted by on November 26, 2009 in to start

 

Happy Diwali!!!

Festival of Lights

Festival of Lights

 
2 Comments

Posted by on October 30, 2008 in to start

 

Some memories of Valentine’s Day!!!

Hmmm….. It seems I stopped literally blogging after last valentine, so I chose this day 2 start all again fresh!!
No more lazy sessions… my inspirations also seems 2 bbbbbbbbbb 222222222 lazy 2 blog these dayzzzzz…. 🙂
Well, let me wish you all Happy Valentine’s Day!!!!
Well I know,all would have their own way of celebrating today!!!! Bad thing is all time high Mumbai would be
too low with festive mood this time…..coz of all d 1st page newssssssssss(read newspapers 🙂 )
But then letzzz hope today things make a bigggg difference and we all unite together and njoy 2day!!!

Talking of Valentine’s Day!!! all must b having some or the other memories of this day.
I remember, when I was in school, then I didn’t know if such a day existed.
Well, you can say I was ignorant. But these days what I see is most of the children, know most of the things.
My chote cousins,niece,nephew keep telling how valentine’s day is coming and what they are planning.

Would sound strange, when I was in 9th or 10th, many of our group friends wished us, Valentine’s day and I didn’t actually
understand what they meant.
I went home and normally I don’t approach mom or dad directly, but that day I didnt get my siblings, so I kept pestering my mom about the day and she told me about the man called Valentine and the story(in short) behind the day!!!!
But then I didnt find her explanation, much to satisfy me, so I went through the newspapers which carried way lot of info about the day 🙂
Well, I was not the only ignorant person 🙂 ………………..that evening, I called up my frnds(whoever didnt know abt the day) and gave them as much info I understood then from the newspaper 🙂
So frankly speaking, I saw this day as a more of a holy day because of Saint Valentine.

And then I have a cousin brother whose b’day falls on the same day.
We all cousins made up a point to wish him Valentine’s Day and not B’day on this day!!!!
He used to get so much irritated with this, that he used to hide his b’day from his frnds 🙂
But we had gr8 fun….we still maintain the same way!!!! but now it doesn’t seem to affect him 🙂

All in one!!!! HAPPY VALENTINE’s DAY to all
Do njoy!!! give away gifts,flowers and mainly try to reach/contact your loved ones and hey last but not the least…. 🙂 wish me 🙂
 

 
10 Comments

Posted by on February 14, 2008 in Friends

 

BEING IN TWENTIES – SOMETHING

I had been a lot lot lot lazy and I dint post anything …… L .but I will try to be a lot more sincere towards my blogging from now on J .I just got a funny stuff to read…and I felt it quite true…….It’s something what I noticed in my life…..and in my frnd’s too  We think and try to live in past when present is in front of us…… and when present becomes past…..still we have the same feeling…… I liked this stuff ..I hope you also would like it too…. J 

 BEING IN TWENTIES – SOMETHINGIt is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn’t know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren’t exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don’t recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren’t really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job… and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn’t. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can’t meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you’re doing this because you know that you aren’t a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself… and while winning the race would be great, right now you’d just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.
We call it the “Quarter-life Crisis.”

  

 
15 Comments

Posted by on June 4, 2007 in to start

 

Orange and not red for my Valentine ????

Disclaimer : Again a romantic story with work of fiction.

I got a rose 2 days before valentine’s, but I never thought about this before.
I took the rose not bothering at all why he was giving me one..but then I like roses..I don’t remember..if I ever cared who gave me one..I was only concerned on having them 🙂
But it seemed he was saying something…but I was so happy to see the fresh orange roses..that I never heard what he said…                               

orange1.jpg

Yes they were small & big fresh orange ones and not the red ones one give for each occasion…
White for peace…Red for love ….Yellow for friendship…what does a Orange signify then ???
May be that’s why I really wanted to know why someone gave me those roses…I thought I should call this guy and thank him well for giving me those beautiful orange roses …I don’t remember if I really thanked him then 😦
But before I called up, I got a call from him …asking me how I felt about the orange roses…I took full advantage of the chance I got and thanked him well enough and tried hearing what he wanted to say this time (only because even I wanted to hear this time 🙂 )
He quickly called for a coffee at Cafe coffee day after college ….This was the first time even when I was looking forward for meeting this guy !!
And I didn’t know the reason..??? Was his orange roses making me do this 🙂
I don’t know…but I was nervous..but why ..I had known this guy for a long time… and why was this meeting so important to me now..that I wanted to be perfect. …oh these orange roses seemed to had some magic….
It was one day before valentine’s day …and here I was with this guy at Cafe coffee day …I was late…. and he was waiting for me
I was conscious for the first time in my life and he seemed to notice that and so he tried to keep me at ease…
We talked about every bit of news (which we can any time get from any newspapers 🙂 ) …but still that changed the enviornment around me
I seemed to like this guy…..but still I wanted to ask him….why he chose to give me orange roses…but I never got a chance..But really those orange roses had done some jadoo on me….I was listening all the time and not talking..which never happens 🙂
Finally, our coffee mugs were empty and it was time for us to move ….he offered to give me a ride to my place and I immediately accepted it.. 🙂
When we reached my destination….he told me he was flying tonight to delhi.I knew somewhere I was upset….but why…I never really ever tried to think what others felt for me..I tried to be normal and wished him Valentine’s day in advance and a safe journey….but all this time…some unknown feelings were coming up and were telling me to stop him from going tomorrow.
I quickly went back home..not because I wanted ..but because I wanted to see him off…from my window..I looked at him ..hiding myself in between the curtains …oh no he is going… 😦 should I stop him…but why should I ??
I looked at the orange roses..they still looked fresh…I had neatly kept them in a flower pot with a little water in it..to keep them fresh…
Are you doing all this with me??….I felt like asking the orange flowers which kept looking at me …

Tomorrow was a big day in college…As usual I would get a lot of red roses…and also would give away a lot of them to my friends …
But I was not able to sleep. I kept thinking about this guy.I knew him from so long…he used to stay in our colony..but we were never friends…but we used to meet eachother in some or the other occasions..and I always shared just a hi hello.
He shifted to delhi along with his parents sometime back..which I never knew.But I remember I had asked someone about his disappearance..He had come here for some work and was returning back.Oh no, I even didn’t take his email id..I really felt bad about this 😦
I overslept and got up at 9.00..but my college classes was at 10…so I quickly started getting ready forgetting everything what I had been thinking off.
I reached college intime…met the same friends..same day…same roses…
Finally I was happy the day ended and started off for my home…Someone called me up….and I was in no mood to take any more of Valentine’s day celebration…I looked back to see him walk upto me with a bunch of orange roses..I was happy as well as surprised to see him…what was he doing here why didn’t he go…and why is he back with one more bunch of orange roses….
He quickly wished me…and gave me the roses….but this time I wanted to hear what he wanted to say….
“I know you want to know..why I am here …because I love you and had been loving all these years but I never had the courage to come up to you and express my feelings ..I always tried to be with you..but it seemed you never noticed me ..but today I couldn’t go without telling you ..what I feel for you..and I know one expects Red roses on a Valentine in place of Orange …well according to me Orange signifies friendship & love and for me both your friendship & love is precious and important. I don’t want to lose either of them.
Slowly he said “Would you be my Valentine ?”
I didn’t know if I heard properly..because I was waiting for him to tell this and I shouted with joy  “Yes…Yes

                                       val.jpg
                              Happy Valentine’s Day!!!

 
18 Comments

Posted by on February 13, 2007 in Kya yahi pyaar hai

 

Where has time gone ???

Hi friends… long time…back again….
Well for long time.. 1 reason was …. I wanted all of u to read my story and comment …. 😀 kidding!!!
Well,reason was ‘I didn’t find time’ .

This clause is something  I don’t understand myself.
When I look back to my childhood…then this word was never in our dictionaries ‘I didn’t have time’ .

Where has time gone? where ?
Well…we will come to that later.
Let me tell you something I did some time back on a weekend & I am happy for that.
I was coming back from church (our church is quite far away ,we come and go by auto , but today while coming back I didnt find a Auto , so I started walking to the main road which is 5-10 mins from the church) .I had almost reached the main road when I heard someone giving a quick ‘hi’. I turned back to see one of my close pals from my school…whom I had never met after school becoz she shifted from our place and we some how could never stay in touch.
We chatted a long time there itself …………
I was so happy to see her…she added quickly ‘chal come home, it’s quite near, you just have to walk the same way you came here “ofcourse if you have time“‘
‘If you have time’ question started moving in my head, besides walking all the way at around 12:30 afternoon made things difficult for me. I was in two minds 😦
– 1 was ‘take her mobile no, call her & plan to meet (which planning itself would take weeks ) and take a auto, you have lots of work to be done before your weekend ends and then mom dad will be waiting for lunch’
-2 was ‘comeon you met her after so many days, walk a little, other things can be done later also, abhi go meet uncle , aunty ‘
Well I opted for the second option and I am happy I did that.
We talked all the way about our school days, about our school friends,about our current state.
At her home, aunty was there so she too was happy to see me after a long time,
We all had a good time.In time I got up coz I knew at home mom dad would be waiting for lunch and luckily I got a auto from there too 🙂
I was quite happy to have gone with option 2 , this made me think ….
Do we really have no time or our priorities have changed ?
I know most of us have a busy schedule …………most of us spend most of our life in office…….. 😦  but still…..is it just our busy schedules that eat up our time or something else
What do you think ….Do we really don’t find time ????????? Where has time gone ???

 
7 Comments

Posted by on February 11, 2007 in to start